Giving and receiving feedback is an artform in itself. Notice how subtle moral judgements resonate through the sentences and notice how you feel when a list of things you could do ‘better’ is being mentioned or written down. It can stir up feelings of confusion or doubts and even stress! The learning and spontaneous flow is blocked inside of a human being immediately. The less fruitful it will be to collaborate or continue friendship. Try this when giving it, as it causes happier, relaxed and creative responses:

1. I see/ heard this…

2. It made me feel…

3. ‘Cause I need support/ understanding/ knowing

4. Would you be willing to offer or help me with…

And: When receiving feedback, and you feel lost, send me an email to help you re-empower, in gaining clarity, and to see the need behind the tragic expression of the other who could not express their need yet (instead comes up with a list of things, judgements, comparisons and ‘you have too’s)

#feedback #nvc #nonviolentcommunication #empathyatwork #empathyinfriendship #empathy #socialchange #coachingonline #coaching

Art historian who discovered the art of connection. Teacher of non-violent communication.

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